sigh sigh. need to blog.
haha. too many things preoccupying my mind.
its faster to type out, n then, i think, mayb, i can let it go.

theres so many things i really dont get.
theres this big big big question. WHY. WHY with a big bold question mark.
plus this other side line.. how come?

the things that r happening now r just confusing.
the responses, the actions.

its like...
why r u so nice to me?
can u just dont be so nice to me?
why r u doing this?
can u just stop it sometimes? tho i know it'll become wierd. n i'll b pretty sad. tho thats what i want.

you

why u?

why do things always happen upside down?

the similarities, the things u do.
sometimes i just cant understand, cant take it.
if i tell u... u'll understand. n u'd listen.
but its pretty odd to stop. its actually such a normal thing to do. but i dont know y i draw the relations. i dont know why it juz sticks to me. ingrained in my brain. hurting me sometimes..

so many misconceptions, misunderstandings, misinterpretations.
makes things awkward sometimes.
it leads me to think... why m i doing this? shd i be doing this?
then ur reaction to it. or rather ur lack of response? seems odd to me.

then again.. back to y r u so nice to me?
to a point where i cant understand.
its so very odd.
or m i thinking too much.
oh gosh. i guess its too much for me to take.

im weird.

who in the world complains when someone is nice to u.

but then again. u r weird.

can u not be so nice to me?

haha. im not making sense.

n im not being coherent here. haha.

i cant take the nice-ness, the concern, the things u do.
its nice.
but far too nice?



or maybe...

im just... scared. paranoid.

is it.. coz of u?
WHY r u still a burden?
will i ever ever ever forget?
will i ever ever ever not b impacted by u ever ever again?
u hurt me so.

mayb i shd just stop thinking, stop remembering, stop drawing connections.
i think too much into things.
im just emo.